An Open Letter To Mariah RE: 'I Stay In Love' Video


mariah_i_stay_in_love.jpgSoulBounce Headquarters
October 28, 2008

RE: "I Stay In Love" Video

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Dear Mariah,

We get it. You have a great body. You're hot. You're smoking. Blah, blah, blah.
But just because you got it, that doesn't mean that you have to always show it. Clearly you didn't get that memo prior to filming your new video for the song "I Stay In Love."

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The video opens up with you walking away from a car that you've just blown up in teeny weeny shorts so tight that I got a yeast infection just looking at you. But the showing of skin didn't end there because as it turns out you play a scantily clad Vegas showgirl in the clip. I saw you getting your Gypsy Rose Lee on while looking longingly at a guy in the audience. Was that supposed to be your man, girl? I guess not since he was all up on another chick after your little routine. You may want to ask for your key and dignity back.

So then you left in a huff, jumped in your car and...rode to the middle
of the dessert to blow up said car? Which brings us back to the scene
that started the video, and leaves so many questions unanswered. Was
that old boy's ride? Were you trying to collect insurance money? Did
you run out of gas? I just don't get it. And then to hop into an SUV at
the end, what was that about? I guess you needed a ride and all, but I
really hope that you knew that guy who picked you up. Because in that
nonexistent outfit you were wearing, you looked like a Law & Order: SVU victim waiting to happen.

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Oh,
Mariah, I hate to be so critical, but you're better than this--or at
least you used to be. Nowadays when I watch your videos I can't tell if
you're selling ass or the song. You're not the only female singer who
keeps misplacing their clothes in their videos, but it's become a joke
now as far as you're concerned. I'm guessing that this is the last
video to be made from E=MC2, but in the event that it isn't, can you do us all a favor and put some clothes on next time?

Sincerely,
Butta

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