From The Comfort Of The SoulBounce Couch: Live-Blogging The 2007 VH1 Hip Hop Honors


2007_vh1_hhh.JPG9:58    Welcome to the first SoulBounce live blog! I cannot wait for this year's Hip Hop Honors to come on but...

9:59    Whose idea was it to have Hip Hop Honors premiere after I Love New York 2? That person needs to get dealt with. Somebody please get this broad and these nuts vying for her infections off of my TV screen quickly.

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10:00   Tracy Morgan is a fool! Somebody please check his SCRAM.

10:01   Why is T-Pain gonna be on this show? I see myself getting mad when he appears on my TV screen.

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10:05   The first honoree is Missy Elliott.

10:06   I see Kerry Washington bought some hair.

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10:07   Missy did all that with the word bitch? The hell is Kerry Washington talkin' 'bout?

10:08   Time for Missy's video segment. Welcome back to Team Chunk, girl.

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10:08   I'm gonna need that Prince t-shirt she's rockin', though.

10:10   Please sahdown, Kerry. I know you were in Saved the Last Dance and all but you are getting on my nerves now.

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10:11   The performance segment is kicking off with Tweet singing "The Rain." Her hair is not super dooper fly.

10:12   What do you know, there's Timbaland in a tight shirt looking all swole.

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10:12   Missy loves some little dancing children. No Michael Jackson.

10:13   Go head, Eve. She's killin' her "Hot Boyz" verse.

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10:14   Go home, Keyshia Cole.

10:14   If Nelly Furtado falls down those stairs!!

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10:14   Where'd Nelly F. get all that trunk junk from??

10:15   I can't see Fatman Scoop without thinking about Man and Wife TV. That is such an unsavory thought.

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10:15   Is that the Grim Reaper dancing on stage? Oh no, it's just Ciara.

10:15   I'm poppin my thang to "Lose Control" as I type this.

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10:21   Here comes Daddy Diddy to kick off the New Jack Swing portion of the evening.

10:22   Diddy is biggin' up Teddy Riley and Mr. Magoo...um, Andre Harrell.

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10:23   Wow, Andre coined the term ghetto fabulous. Thanks, I think.

10:24   Teddy Riley rocking a baldy? Not a good look when your head has corners.

10:25   "PUT SOME CHAMPAGNE IN THE GAME!" Thanks for my new mantra, Andre.

10:25   Lawd, I love New Jack Swing!

10:26    AW NAW, HELL NAW! T-Pain is in the NJS tribute?

10:27    Get it, Doug E. Fresh!  Dag I can't wop and type at the same time!

10:28    AW HELL TO THE NAW! T-Pain sitchononsingingbooboothefoollookingass down!

10:28    If I was Keith Sweat and had to listen to T-Pain butcher my song like that I'd be nice and pissed right now.

10:29    Why is T-Pain still singing? Take me now, Lord! TAKE ME NOW!

10:29    I'd be mad if I was Ne-Yo and had to follow that clown.

10:30    Ne-Yo is doing "I Like" justice. I aint mad.

10:31    Oh my damn! Kool Moe Dee! Welcome to Team Chunk to you, too.

10:31    LL Cool J is somewhere laughing his tight abs off right now. 

10:36    Oh Lawd...a skit with Tracy Morgan as a cab driver. This should be good.

10:37    OK, not so much.

10:37    Salt-N-Pepa's here! Along with Pep's new pinched nose.

10:38    I'm confused...didn't they just do they New Jack Swing tribute?

10:38    Ne-Yo's back and he's remembering the time.

10:38    Oh God, Keyshia Cole is back, too. Is her mic turned on? If so, please turn it off. She looks great but sounds a hot mess.

10:39    Aw shucks, a 1/2 of Blackstreet reunion.

10:40    Aw damn, Teddy Riley is all winded and ish. I hope that a medic is backstage with some oxygen.

10:41    RUMPSHAKER! Excuse me..dance break!

10:42    Oh no, Teddy Riley is doing his rap from "Rumpshaker" at like half the speed. Bless his heart.

10:48    Why does Tracy Morgan have that hot ass shearling coat on?

10:50    Heeeeeey, Uncle L. Please sutograph a copy of your fitness book to Kool Moe Desserts.

10:51    Time for the Wild Style video segment.

10:51    I need to know where Charlie Ahearn got that blinged out Wild Style t-shirt from, too.

10:52    Fab 5 Freddy looks the same as he did 25 years ago. How old is he anyway? He's the Black Dick Clark.

10:53    That basketball court scene in Wild Style is truly a classic.

10:53    I'm loving these old photos and footage from early 80's NYC.

10:54    Grandmaster Caz from the Cold Crush Brothers, KRS-One, Chief Rocker Busy Bee and Grand Wizard Theodore are about the kill it. I feel it coming on.

10:54    Did LL just say reciprient??

10:55    Go head, Busy Bee. I see you rockin' the mic right.

10:55    Those b-boys better get it!

10:56    The Blastmaster! Love how KRS incorporated Jena 6 into his rap. Hotness.

10:57   Aw damn, KRS-One's 2004 Hip Hop Honors medal just broke off of the ribbon it was on.  Good thing it didn't fly off into the crowd.

10:58    Go head, Grandmaster Caz. THIS IS HIP HOP!

10:58    "I'm old school, but I'm still in my prime." I know that's right, Caz!

11:01    Tracy Morgan is back at it in another cab skit. Next!

11:02    Chris Rock is announcing the Whodini segment.

11:04    Whodini was oh so sexy in their prime. I'm gonna need them to explain what happened.   

11:07   I'm hating that I missed the Fresh Fest back in the day.

11:07   Oh snap, UTFO used to be dancers for Whodini? You learn something new everyday.

11:08   Here comes another Whodini dancer from back in the day, Jermaine Dupri, in their tribute.

11:08    Nelly and Nick Cannon are in this tribute, too? Ohhhkaaay.

11:08    Nick Cannon looks corny but he sounds kinda hot on "Funky Beat." Excuse me!

11:09    Nelly surprisingly sounds decent doing "One Love." Color me surprised.

11:09   I do need this dancing chick to sahdown, though. I'm getting a yeast infection just looking at how tight her clothes are.

11:10    "Five Minutes Of Funk" with Jermaine Dupri. He sounds damn good, too.

11:11    Aw sooky sooky! Whodini is taking the stage! Y'all better get it, Ecstasy and Jalil.

11:11    FRIENDS! HOW MANY OF US HAVE THEM?

11:12   They are rockin' the house with "The Freaks Come Out At Night." Love it!

11:13   Who is this random dude on stage with Whodini?

11:14   DANCE BREAK! Even Nelly is doin' the wop.

11:14   Oh snap! Jermane Dupri did a little breakdancing move. He still got it.

11:15   Grandmaster Dee is cutting up on the wheels steel.

11:15   Some big dudes picked Grandmaster up and carried him off the stage! And he was STILL scratchin'! I love it!

11:15
   Why don't DJ's call themselves Grandmaster anymore? I think I'm gonna start calling myself Grandmaster Butta. OK, OK, Grandmistress Butta. LOL

11:20   It's time for the felon's portion of the evening.

11:21   Harvey Keitel is introducing Snoop Dogg. HARVEY KEITEL?

11:22   The first record Snoop bought was the 45 of "Ring My Bell" by Anita Ward. Something is so wrong yet so right about that.

11:24   I'm still not understanding Harvey Keitel's purpose here.

11:25   B.G. and T.I. are kicking the Snoop tribute off. "Cause it's 187 on an undercover cop."

11:26   Pharrell is flowing quite nicely on "Aint Nuthin But A G Thang."

11:26   Where the hell did Daz appear from? He just popped up outta the floor. Hilarity.

11:27   No Ice T didn't just C-Walk onto the stage. He's sippin' on "Gin & Juice" right now.

11:28   WESTSIDE!

11:32   Yet another Tracy Morgan taxi cab skit.

11:33    Harvey Keitel AGAIN? Did I miss something? Is he homies with Snoop now?

11:34   Part two of the Snoop tribute. Look at Lil Bow Wow trying to act all hard. Ciara ain't studyin' you, homie.

11:3
4
   Snoop comes out to help him with "What's My Name." Show him how it's done, Snoop Dizzle.

11:35   Here comes Skateboard P to "Drop It Like It's Hot."

11:36   Snoop is flowing on his verse in his 4X lumberjack shirt.

11:37    The Tribe Called Quest segment kicks off after the commercial break. I've been waiting for this allll day.

11:42   Tracy Morgan is back in a velvet coat. I'm hot just looking at him.

11:43   Aw yeah! Aw yeah! Here comes ATCQ.

11:44   Awwwwwww...look at Phife looking all sickly. Bless his heart. Pray for him tonight, y'all.
 
11:45   I see you Jairobi!

11:45   Native Tongues got rhymes galore!

11:47   Common kicks it off with "Bonita Applebum"!

11:47    What the devil do these dancers have on? They need some chicks in headwraps and mudcloth. That's how Tribe woulda done back in the dizzay. 

11:48   Pharrell AGAIN? He's sounding good, though, on "Electric Relaxation" so I'm not mad.

11:49   BOO, Lupe Fiasco, BOOOOOOO! No this aggin didn't chuckle when he forgot the lyrics?? He officially gets the gas face.

11:49   Look at Common acting all hard and what not on "Scenario."

11:50   Busta Rhymes is a little thick in the waist but he came out full force on his "Scenario" verse. LOVE IT!

11:50   What in the world is Busta saying? I think he's saying his lyrics but it's sounding like a foreign language right about now.

11:56    A Tribe Called Quest is closing the show. I'm in heaven right now.

11:56   Put your fists up for hip hop!

11:56   What is Consequence doing up there? Sahdown if you're just taking up space.

11:57   "Check The Ryhme," y'all! Oh snap, Phife is kicking his verse and doesn't sound as bad as he looks. He's still on my prayer list, though.

11:58   We on "Award Tour" with Mohammed my man!!  Q-Tip is killing it and Ali Shaheed Mohammed is rocking the wheels of steel! This is truly incredible.

12:00   Aw man! Here come the credits. I don't want this to end!

12:00   Go head, Phife! Buddy, buddy, buddy, all up in my face!

12:01   The crowd is going bananas up in the Hammerstein Ballroom.

12:01   Oh no! The credits are done rolling. It's a wrap on this year's VH1 Hip Hop Honors, y'all. It's been fun! See ya at the next SoulBounce live blog!

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